Wednesday

I have been told that it may be unhealthy for my relationship to write in my significant other's voice to chronicle his fictional sexcapades. Therefore, I'll be resigning to writing about them in my voice.

Yesterday he went to class and fell asleep in both because he went to sleep too late. He went to a judo guy to see about the class (which he'll be starting tomorrow-5 days a week). There was a cute foreigner sitting in the corner but she didn't say anything about being in the judo club until after he was about to leave.

70% of his class is supposedly made up of girls, although apparently I shouldn't worry about it since quite a few of them are quite slow or have annoying mannerisms such as ending every fragmented sentence in a question? And there's one girl that talks really quiet but he likes shy girls and has an obsession with cuteness, and an odd ego-he went shopping for mt. fuji(but ended up not going because someone* forgot to book it) and got a black jacket that apparently looks good on him seeing as he keeps getting looks from girls (including hs girls) great, that's a great thing to let your girlfriend know, that you're so freaking attractive that everyone stares out you. FYI the more gloating you do about yourself or how much you enjoy girls checking you out, the less attractive you seem. It's something of an inverse proportionality relationship.

And then, there's the one that stands out and I assume he has a thing for but I don't care because I don't get jealous, I walk away. So she's Indonesian, knows about 4 languages 'fluently', 'double majoring' in jp and pre med but supposedly she finished schooling a year earlier, and is basically described as being perfect. I bring this up because it's beginning to get on my nerves. His idea of a drawback? She takes terrible pictures. Well, that's reassuring, so then she's really attractive in real life, is what he's saying. I'm trying my hardest to get a lab position at the moment, so I can put things on my resume and hopefully get into grad school, where I'll slave away for 2 years or so and then apply to med school (because I actually do want to help everyone and anyone I can by setting up a clinic even if it's out of my own pocket and I make only enough that I can live on and it's not like this super cute girl who wants to make money because 'you can always use more'), where I'll work my tail off for another 6 years (depending on specialty) and then do actual work till I die. Things have never come easy for me but I'm persistent and it's helped me go a lot further than what I usually set out to do.

Sometimes I love being in a relationship and other times it's, quite frankly, a pain in the ass.

I think that is one of the issues with being in a long distance relationship-you don't know how they interact with other people and so you could technically get the* call anytime, seemingly out of the blue. There are always, always other women even if there aren't any, because off handed statements like so and so is cute, or ate dinner with them, or went out drinking till morning in their room, and lying on some girl's bed, or so and so wandered into my room in between drinking binges don't always fabricate the most reassuring thoughts. facebook proves to be the* worst. Aftermath pictures, where drunk hugging can be blown out of proportion as to what happened outside of the pictures taken.. Regardless of whether or not they're 'nice' girls, from my perspective they are tramps, whores, sluts, and I begin to regret basically spending a large chunk of my savings so I can meet these so called nice girls.

His regular crowd: three girls and one gay guy. That sounds fun, especially when you get to go out drinking with girls who are either flirting with you or attempting to set you up with a so called 'cute japanese girls'. Excuse me while I go off on a tangent(or vomit), but what the hell is it about cute japanese girls anyway? Ever since I started Japanese 1, about 5 guys have asked if I was japanese, and then they look disappointed when I say no. Why does it matter anyway. But that's besides the point, what is the obsession with asian girls in general. I really don't understand. And I despise it when people decide to categorize me as 'asian' and leave it at that. I am myself and that should be enough. I don't know if I'm digging for things that don't even exist, but asian physical features or stereotypical mannerisms shouldn't be the only things that define me.

So then, I get to compete with a jp university's worth of girls studying something he's studying, a crap load of foreigners who might just want to live there (which he might want to do), people he meet while drunk, girls who like drinking as much as he does or more (dirty dirty whores), or who actually enjoy going on roller coasters, girls who know more than 2 languages, and don't yell at him over skype for being stupid, girls who are more athletic, or smarter, or more attractive..

How terribly frustrating.

And I wonder if all of this came out simply because I got into a head on bike accident earlier..